


I'm Sorry Mr. Stark

by delightfulmania



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Peter Parker, Hurt/Comfort, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Self-Harm, Tony Stark Has A Heart, stay safe ppl, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-07
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-07-08 05:09:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15923507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delightfulmania/pseuds/delightfulmania
Summary: Tony Stark finds out about Peter's issues, and all he wants is to help.





	I'm Sorry Mr. Stark

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time uploading a fic! Be warned that there is heavy mentions of self harm, so if that upsets you please don't read!! Stay safe <3

He had been bullied for a long time. 

Flash had started picking on him when he was young, and since then it had been constant. Sometimes it got worse, sometimes it was easier, but it never went away. It was in seventh grade, when it had gotten bad, that he had found a way to deal with it.

It wasn’t healthy, he knew that. Maybe he didn’t at first, when he accidentally cut his hand while chopping vegetables for Aunt May, and then took the knife and put another cut beside it. He didn’t realize what it would lead to, all he knew was it helped. It made him feel better, the pain from the cut washed over him and got rid of the scrambled mess of thoughts in his brain, at least for a few moments. He repeated it a few days later, after he got home early because he ran from the torment of flash. May was still at work, and he saw the knives on the counter as he came in, and through his tears he found the even the thought brought him down a notch. He took a knife and carefully, across his forearm, drew a line. It bubbled red, and the dopamine rush that followed brought him a wave of relief. He quickly stuck a bandaid on it, cleaned the knife, and put it back.

It became more and more frequent as the years passed, moving from his arm to his thigh and getting deeper as time passed. When the nights were long, when he couldn’t forget his parents, when Flash’s teasing got to him, he would pull out the blade he had carefully taken from a pencil sharpener and go back to his old habits. Nobody ever knew, he made sure that the scars and cuts were carefully covered at all times, and that nobody ever found out.

That was before he became spiderman.

Now a days he did it less, finding himself instead going out to find crime and letting himself get a bit more beat up than he should, letting the pain wash over him again. Sometimes, though, he can’t help himself. His brain occasionally would scream at him to draw those red lines, and no matter what he couldn’t stop it. His powers meant that he could heal faster, which meant that the open wounds lasted a short amount of time, and turned to scars fairly fast. The scars were also more slight, less obvious. 

After his experiences with fighting, it became more often. Particularly the memory of Toomes, and specifically the building crashing down on him, haunted his mind. He would have flashbacks, panic attacks, and he would feel once again as if he was there suffocating. When he could think, when he could act, he would reach for a blade once more. He would sit and let the flood of dopamine rush through him, and he would sigh in relief. It was hard to stay away from it when it made the awful, terrible thoughts and feelings leave for a moment. He knew they would always come back, and even more after he acted on his urges because he hated that he would cut. He felt immense regret each time, beating himself up mentally because _Dammit Peter, you fucked up again. ___

__Things had been better after Toomes, other than his mental state. Mr. Stark respected him more now, and they frequently worked together on things like the suit, and his webs. He would bring him on missions, and sometimes he would stay over at the compound. He got used to seeing the other avengers in the hallways, he had always felt lesser than them but they treated him as an equal. He didn’t know it, but they all adored Peter._ _

__It was one of those nights, where he stayed in a room that was always ready for him, and woke up to go work with Tony in the lab. It was a friday night, and he had just left for his room for the evening. He showered, got into sweatpants and a shirt, and lied down to scroll through his phone when he was hit by the panic. It was never expected, he hadn’t yet identified what caused it, and it tended to happen at random. It built, from the slight sense of panic at first till he could barely breathe, breathing in sporadic short breaths, and hyperventilating as he curled up beneath his covers, sitting with his knees clutched to his chest and head between them. The feeling in his chest swallowed him, sweeping from his head to his toes as he shook._ _

__He sat in the darkness, eyes closed for what seemed like forever, when he remembered his blade. At first he panicked at the thought of cutting while here, not in his home, but as the fear raged on and he couldn’t seem to collect himself. So he crawled out from beneath his covers and retrieved his blade. He pulled down his sweatpants to reveal his scarred thighs, covered in the remnants of the habit that haunted him, and went to add more._ _

__~_ _

__Tony had sent the kid to bed a bit ago, it was around 10 and he figured that he should be in bed. Although he knew he probably wouldn’t sleep, he tried his best to be responsible. He cared for Peter like his own kid, and wanted to make sure he was being healthy. It was at 11, an hour later, when he decided to go check up on him, see if he was sleeping, tell him to go to bed or something._ _

__He made sure to tidy up the lab before he left, before heading out to walk the distance to where he had set up a place for Pete, set aside a room just for him._ _

__When he arrived, he wanted to make sure he didn’t wake him up and disturb his rest, even if he wasn’t asleep yet. He quietly opened the door and peered in, but nothing could prepare him for what he saw._ _

__Peter was sitting there, a blade in his hand, taking swipes at his thigh, dragging it across his skin, creating red bubbling lines that contrasted against the white of the scars that sat beside the angry slits. The cuts were decently deep, tearing the skin in two in each spot, and in that moment Tony’s heart broke. He knew what was happening, and he hated it. He hated that he had let this happen to Peter, blamed himself for not seeing it earlier._ _

__Briefly his thoughts drifted back to his past, to the times when he too had done damage to himself to bring him relief from the pain in his mind. He hadn’t been the same as peter, instead being self-destructive in behaviour and occasionally burning himself with fire from the lighter he kept in his pocket at all time. He knew, though. He knew what this was like and he could feel the pain in that moment, the pain that radiated through the room._ _

__His instincts acted quickly, the logic of maybe talking to Peter first instead ignored, as he ran towards him and tore the blade from his hand. He could see the horror in his eyes as the teenager looked up, and tears sprung into his eyes._ _

__“I’m sorry Mr. Stark” His voice shook, unstable as he looked up at Tony._ _

__“Don’t be sorry kid, please don’t be sorry. I just want to make sure you’re okay.” Tony managed to get out, holding onto the tears that stung his eyes._ _

__He shoved the blade into his pocket to get rid of later, and looked down to examine the damage. None of the cuts needed stitches, but he needed to be patched up._ _

__“Hold on for a second, let’s get you cleaned up okay?” As he got up and pulled the first aid kit down from the wall. He had one in every room, and he silently thanked himself for making sure that happened._ _

__He pulled out the gauze, and started soaking up the blood, applying pressure to get the multitude of wounds to stop bleeding. He began using medical tape to close the wounds, pulling them together, and as he was doing this he looked to the kid, who was still shaking._ _

__“Breathe with me Pete, okay?” Peter shook his head, his breaths still shaking from the panic attack. Tony could tell that was what was happening, and knew he needed to breathe._ _

__“It’s okay Mr. Stark, it’s nothing, I’ll clean myself up, it’s okay, you can go, you don’t need to deal with my problems.” He spoke in quick, short bursts, between short, heaving breaths._ _

__“No kid, I’m here and I’m going to make sure you’re okay, and that you’re taken care of. I should never have let this happen and now I’m making sure it doesn’t happen again.” He took a deep breath, and looked the kid in the eyes, “Breathe in” He spoke, calmly although he didn’t feel such, and breathed in, “and out” he let out the air he was holding._ _

__He repeated this again and again, until Peter had calmed down, and was now breathing normally. Tony could tell that he was scared, knew he was blaming himself, and Tony wouldn’t let that happen._ _

__“This isn’t your fault, okay Peter? You are not to blame and it is okay. You will be okay. I’ve been there before, and I know how much it hurts. We’re gonna make sure you get better now. I’m not angry, I’m just sad I couldn’t help you before._ _

__Peter sighed, looking up at the man he had grown so attached to._ _

__“I’m sorry Mr. Stark, thank you for helping. It won’t happen again, I promise. I just..” He paused, to wipe his tears away, but new ones appeared to take their place, “I can’t stop thinking of all the bad, of when that building collapsed on me, of all the times I’ve messed up.”_ _

__“I know kid, I know. We’ll help that okay? But right now I know you’re tired, and we’re going to finish mending you up and get you to bed, and I promise I’m gonna take better care of you now. We’re going to get you the help you need”_ _

__Peter nodded, and as Tony finished wrapping his leg in bandages and getting him back in his sweatpants, he reached over and hugged him, clinging to the older man._ _

__“Thank you Mr. Stark, Thank you so much.”_ _

__Tony just held him, bringing him close and rubbing his back as Peter continued to cry, and soon he could tell that he was tired, and laid him down in his bed, making sure to be careful of his injured leg, and tucked him in, he ruffled his hair as he turned out the light._ _

__“Goodnight kid, I’ll be there in the morning okay?”_ _

__“Goodnight Mr. Stark. I love you” He said sleepily, his eyes drooping closed._ _

__“I love you too kid. Sleep well”_ _


End file.
